Mistermoonlight
Administrator
Crystal the Monkey Fan Club
"The dreamers ride against the men of action. Oh see the men of action falling back."--Leonard Cohen
Posts: 8,508
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Post by Mistermoonlight on Aug 14, 2012 20:21:21 GMT -5
If we came up with a set of bizarre new membership regulations which we'd try to persuade new members they had to follow to join The Evicted, what would they be?
1. For the first 90 days you must refer to at least one other poster as 'girlfriend' in each post you make, no matter whether they are male or female.
2. You May Not Capitalize Each Word In A Sentence.
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Aeryn
Supernatural Fight Club
Posts: 6,545 
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Post by Aeryn on Aug 14, 2012 21:40:12 GMT -5
3. When you join us, you'll lose 30 pounds in a week.
4. Your mother-in-law will die after your 10th post.
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SoCal
Supernatural Fight Club
Posts: 6,543
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Post by SoCal on Aug 14, 2012 22:29:12 GMT -5
5. You may not change your avatar more than 3 times per calendar year.
6. Your first post must be the absolute truth, then you may lie with impunity.
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Aeryn
Supernatural Fight Club
Posts: 6,545
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Post by Aeryn on Aug 15, 2012 9:49:13 GMT -5
7. Only Leos are allowed to make new threads.
8. Anyone under 5' 8" will be forced to watch Justin Bieber videos.
9. Anyone over 6' 1" and who has tattoos will live with Aeryn for a few days.
10. Girls who have blond hair will be shot.
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Mistermoonlight
Administrator
Crystal the Monkey Fan Club
"The dreamers ride against the men of action. Oh see the men of action falling back."--Leonard Cohen
Posts: 8,508
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Post by Mistermoonlight on Aug 15, 2012 10:30:32 GMT -5
11. Advocating that Barney Rubble of The Flintstones be eaten by Godzilla = immediate 3-day ban.
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SoCal
Supernatural Fight Club
Posts: 6,543
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Post by SoCal on Aug 15, 2012 12:15:46 GMT -5
12. Anyone who thinks the Jetsons are imaginary are banned.
13. Anyone under 30 years of age must have a competent adult monitoring their posts.
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Aeryn
Supernatural Fight Club
Posts: 6,545
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Post by Aeryn on Aug 15, 2012 13:49:55 GMT -5
14. Anyone who thinks the Captain on Gilligan's Island was straight is wrong.
15. If you don't believe that Jimmy was doing OTHER things with that flute, you're high.
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Mistermoonlight
Administrator
Crystal the Monkey Fan Club
"The dreamers ride against the men of action. Oh see the men of action falling back."--Leonard Cohen
Posts: 8,508
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Post by Mistermoonlight on Aug 15, 2012 15:03:01 GMT -5
16. It is not necessary to address mods and admins as 'sir' or 'ma'am.'
A simple
*bows*
or
*curtsies*
is fine.
If you simply must use a term of endearment, we sometimes respond well to 'darling.'
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Aeryn
Supernatural Fight Club
Posts: 6,545
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Post by Aeryn on Aug 15, 2012 16:38:57 GMT -5
17. It is absolutely necessary to address mods and administrators in the rudest manner possible.
18. It is also necessary to address Aeryn as either "The Exalted One" or "Your Highness."
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Mistermoonlight
Administrator
Crystal the Monkey Fan Club
"The dreamers ride against the men of action. Oh see the men of action falling back."--Leonard Cohen
Posts: 8,508
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Post by Mistermoonlight on Aug 15, 2012 17:14:03 GMT -5
19. Use of the phrase 'wondering aloud' is prohibited.
We can't hear you to verify that it's true.
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Aeryn
Supernatural Fight Club
Posts: 6,545
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Post by Aeryn on Aug 15, 2012 17:22:41 GMT -5
20. Anyone who posts library stories will be beaten to death with a shovel.
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Mistermoonlight
Administrator
Crystal the Monkey Fan Club
"The dreamers ride against the men of action. Oh see the men of action falling back."--Leonard Cohen
Posts: 8,508
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Post by Mistermoonlight on Aug 15, 2012 17:33:25 GMT -5
21. No fan-created videos allowed. ![]() Only videos created by human beings may be posted. |
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Aeryn
Supernatural Fight Club
Posts: 6,545
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Post by Aeryn on Aug 15, 2012 17:35:50 GMT -5
22. Underwear is strictly prohibited.
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Mistermoonlight
Administrator
Crystal the Monkey Fan Club
"The dreamers ride against the men of action. Oh see the men of action falling back."--Leonard Cohen
Posts: 8,508
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Post by Mistermoonlight on Aug 15, 2012 17:38:38 GMT -5
23. For some, if you post while naked and drunk, your karma may rise.
For others it will have the opposite effect.
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Aeryn
Supernatural Fight Club
Posts: 6,545
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Post by Aeryn on Aug 15, 2012 17:41:36 GMT -5
24. If you post naked, drunk, and give Moon a lap dance you'll definitely get karma.
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Mistermoonlight
Administrator
Crystal the Monkey Fan Club
"The dreamers ride against the men of action. Oh see the men of action falling back."--Leonard Cohen
Posts: 8,508
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Post by Mistermoonlight on Aug 15, 2012 17:45:15 GMT -5
25. Multiple posts of the same exact thing are considered spam, unless you first are granted permission by The Evicted Department of Redundancy Department. In triplicate.
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SoCal
Supernatural Fight Club
Posts: 6,543
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Post by SoCal on Aug 15, 2012 18:31:45 GMT -5
26. Posters who whine excessively are subjected to a 3-day banning.
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Post by AntiArbitrator on Aug 15, 2012 18:49:21 GMT -5
27. Anyone who is online from 7 AM until midnight is submitted to Aeryn The Amazing Fortune Teller who will choose your future mate.
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Aeryn
Supernatural Fight Club
Posts: 6,545
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Post by Aeryn on Aug 15, 2012 18:59:58 GMT -5
28. Anyone who gives Aeryn a spanking receives a free Netflix membership.
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Post by davidhayes1956 on Aug 15, 2012 19:03:52 GMT -5
29. Anyone giving Mister Moonlight a pair of spanx will get a personal thank you note from Aeryn.
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Aeryn
Supernatural Fight Club
Posts: 6,545
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Post by Aeryn on Aug 15, 2012 19:07:46 GMT -5
30. Anyone who believes what David just said is smoking too much weed.  |
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Post by davidhayes1956 on Aug 15, 2012 19:08:14 GMT -5
9. Anyone over 6' 1" and who has tattoos will live with Aeryn for a few days. I'm 6'2" when I'm standing up AND lying down! Fortunately for Aeryn, I have no tats. Tits, no tats. |
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Mistermoonlight
Administrator
Crystal the Monkey Fan Club
"The dreamers ride against the men of action. Oh see the men of action falling back."--Leonard Cohen
Posts: 8,508
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Post by Mistermoonlight on Aug 15, 2012 19:08:48 GMT -5
31. Be peaceful, be courteous, obey the law, respect everyone, but if someone doesn't spell check, send them to the cemetery.
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Aeryn
Supernatural Fight Club
Posts: 6,545
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Post by Aeryn on Aug 15, 2012 19:09:47 GMT -5
9. Anyone over 6' 1" and who has tattoos will live with Aeryn for a few days. I'm 6'2" when I'm standing up AND lying down! Fortunately for Aeryn, I have no tats. Tits, no tats. I'll make an exception for you, darling.  |
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SoCal
Supernatural Fight Club
Posts: 6,543
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Post by SoCal on Aug 15, 2012 19:54:21 GMT -5
32. Gratuitous posting featuring old Farscape videos will result in 3-day banishment.
33. For your 500th post, you will be gifted with D-cup enchancement. (watch out fellas!)
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Aeryn
Supernatural Fight Club
Posts: 6,545
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Post by Aeryn on Aug 15, 2012 19:58:56 GMT -5
34. Anyone who posts Farscape videos will get a blow...pop from me. 35. If you post animal porn, Moon will bless you for it.  |
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Mistermoonlight
Administrator
Crystal the Monkey Fan Club
"The dreamers ride against the men of action. Oh see the men of action falling back."--Leonard Cohen
Posts: 8,508
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Post by Mistermoonlight on Aug 15, 2012 20:01:55 GMT -5
36. For those who feel the call of nature while online, there are convenient restrooms located on the third page of each forum.
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Mistermoonlight
Administrator
Crystal the Monkey Fan Club
"The dreamers ride against the men of action. Oh see the men of action falling back."--Leonard Cohen
Posts: 8,508
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Post by Mistermoonlight on Aug 15, 2012 20:05:56 GMT -5
37. All member birthdays will be entered as 1/1/1999 to cut down on individual 'happy birthday' threads every week.
Happy upcoming birthday.
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SoCal
Supernatural Fight Club
Posts: 6,543
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Post by SoCal on Aug 15, 2012 20:19:58 GMT -5
38. The first poster of the day is required to supply adult beverages to all the others posters. Pretzels are optional.
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Aeryn
Supernatural Fight Club
Posts: 6,545
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Post by Aeryn on Aug 15, 2012 20:29:58 GMT -5
39. The second poster of the day is required to supply adult toys to all the other posters. KY is optional.
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